Attorney Work Product

Body Image

Pretty much all women suffer from body image issues, I am sure, and pretty much all pregnant women, especially, struggle with the changes wrought over their body during the course of nine months. I was so upset when I wasn't showing at all, because I wanted the whole world to know that I was with child. I am so proud of myself that my total weight gain for this pregnancy is less than 20 pounds. Still, at this point, everyone feels entitled to comment on my appearance, and it is getting on my nerves. The comments fall into three basic categories:

(1) You don't look that far along! This I take as mostly a compliment. I haven't gained a lot, which is good. And while my weight gain seems to be all baby, baby is staying very close to Momma, and so I don't have the basketball stomach that really skinny women tend to get. These comments I don't mind too much.

(2) You don't look pregnant at all! These people are trying to compliment me, but they are failing miserably. All I can think of is, "Does that mean you just think I always have a big belly? You just see me as being this fat? Can't you see that the belly is baby-shaped, not fat-shaped?" I think I have inadvertantly sowed the seeds for this one by not wearing a lot of maternity clothes. I haven't had to -- my sweaters and such fit, even if they cling in the belly a little bit. But they don't really flatter -- they cling in the belly a little bit. With only two weeks left, I am not going to go out and my more clothes, but next time around I need to either buy or borrow more maternity tops, at least. I want it to be obvious that this is baby, not fat.

(3) "****" (not a word about baby). Look, I'm not trying to be the center of attention here -- and I understand that people would generally be hesitant to ask a stranger on the street "are you pregnant?" just in case the person were just fat, but... by 9 months, it should be pretty clear that this is baby, not fat. I think. I mean, c'mon, isn't it? We saw a former colleague that I hadn't seen in a while at a dinner last night -- and when I say we, I am referring to a tableful of current coworkers and one woman who had a baby last June and is expecting again this August, and so has not come back to the firm. This former colleague asked the other pregnant woman all about her baby and pregnancy, and didn't say word one about baby to me. I just wanted to scream, "CAN'T YOU SEE I AM DUE IN LESS THAN THREE WEEKS????" Another colleague told me later that she looked more pregnant than I did, since my dress tended to disguise the belly, particularly when I was sitting. The other pregnant woman is a very petite girl, and she was pregnant with #2, so she was very obviously with child. But I thought it was weird to not be acknowledge at all. Again, it falls into the "I guess you just see me as a fat girl" category.

I also haven't had the problems that all of my other pregnant friends complain about of strangers grabbing/rubbing their belly out of nowhere. And while I don't WANT strangers grabbing at me, there is a small part of me that again feels like that must mean I look just fat, not pregnant. Weird how our minds play tricks with us.

The important thing, I guess, is my husband thinks I look absolutely fabulous, and God Bless him, tells me so every day. That's probably the only thing that keeps me from being outright depressed about the whole belly thing.